24 December 2004

The King of Jing-a-ling

Charlie-In-The Box: I am the official sentry of the Isle of Misfit toys. My name is...
Rudolph: Don't tell me: Jack.
Charlie-In-The Box: No, Charlie. That's why I'm a misfit toy. My name is all wrong. No child wants to play with a Charlie-In-The-Box so I had to come here.
-Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer

For the record, the kids are watching the Misfit Toys song arguing over which toys they want.

Have you ever noticed what an jerk Santa is in the Rankin/Bass Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer? Consider the following:

  • He tells Donner that he Rudolph's nose had better stop glowing, or he wouldn't be able to pull the sleigh
  • He tells Donner how disappointed he is when Rudolph's nose is uncovered.
  • The elves sing the new song they've been working on and Santa's only response is that it "need's work."
  • When telling Rudolph that Donner, Rudolph's mom, and Clarice are missing, Santa is very worried, but not about their welfare, mind you. No, he's worried that without Donner he won't be able to drive his sleigh.
Now that's a bad Santa.



P.S. How'd they get my dad to do Comet's voice? (Actually, it was Don Adams.)
P.P.S. If you haven't seen Mad TV's Raging Rudolph, you need to.

1 comment:

Jeri said...

I agree. Every year we watch this thing and it's by far the most MST'd movie of the season. It's gotten to a Rocky Horror point by now, wherein every time Santa completes one of his put-downs, we spontaneously utter "Dick!"

Which hurts us, to say that about Santa. But remember, he's not the real Santa. The real Santa is in "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town," in his young, idealistic phase, and later in "Year Without a Santa Claus," during a brief existential crisis.

Say, what's wrong with that misfit doll, anyway? Personality disorder? Arteriosclerosis?

A belated Merry Christmas/Happy New Year to you and yours.